In my last post I talked about a client who I recently worked with to access her anger reaction in the moment through Somatic Experiencing. She had been hanging onto her anger over a conversation with a friend. Instead of confronting the friend in the moment, she struggled to suppress her reaction and then, later on, to forgive her friend.
Read MoreJust as Laura Davis describes in her book I Thought We'd Never Speak Again: The Road from Estrangement to Reconciliation, I have seen positive outcomes when working with adult children of abusers who have been able to regain closeness with their previously abusive relatives.
Read MoreMany of us have an ”inner child” or an “inner younger part” who has not been heard, seen, or treated in a healthy nurturing way. As a result, whether it is an inner child, adolescent, or younger adult, feelings of being ignored, abandoned, or not loved may be retained. The memories of these unresolved feelings are carried into our adult life and often become buried in the subconscious.
Read MoreMerriam Webster dictionary defines trust as the "assured reliance on the character, ability, strength, or truth of someone or something" and "one in which confidence is placed."
But unfortunately, trust can be broken in many ways. We may have been betrayed, mistreated, lied to or hurt by someone such as a partner, family, friend or colleague.
Read MoreWhy is everyone looking the other way while a woman is harassed on the bus, a child is abused by a parent in the parking lot of a grocery store, or a stranger on the street is being attacked? Why isn’t anyone doing or saying anything? We all know that there are true heroes among us who will risk their own lives to help others. But what makes one person a bystander and another a hero?
Read MoreIt was 11:05 a.m., and my new client, Margaret, was five minutes late for her first therapy appointment. Just as I was about to call to check in with her, I could hear her footsteps coming up the stairs. Her facial expression showed disorientation. In an irritated tone, she explained that she had gone up and down the street looking in vain for my office, because there was no sign with my name on it.
Read More“Within a very short time, we received 900 phone calls after Typhoon Haiyan struck the Philippines on November 8,” Marianna Thomas, head of food and shelter for the American Red Cross in San Francisco, told me.
Read MoreCategorization of emotions into positive and negative—that is, seeing them as black and white—may not benefit us. Perhaps we can see emotions of all kinds as human experiences that give us information about ourselves. Emotions can also be a motivator for our actions and a precursor to reactions.
Read MoreGiving too much of yourself and saying yes too often is something many people are accustomed to doing to avoid conflicts and feelings of guilt. A sincere desire to give is wonderful, however, there’s a distinction between giving of yourself and giving up yourself. Ignoring your own desires and views may not only deny “who you are” but, over time, may lead to resenting others, feeling fatigued or anxious, and experiencing stress induced physical symptoms.
Read MoreOn a post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) forum, a college student cries out for help: “Hey, everyone, I’m having a really hard time with course work right now.” He elaborates, “I’m dissociating a lot right now, and it’s making me pretty dysfunctional some days. For those of you who are, or have been, in college, do you have any suggestions that might help me deal with dissociation and concentration problems?”
Read MoreLearning to recognize and respond to our internal alarm signals—which assess every situation and inform us of appropriate reactions—helps us to let go of grudges and to forgive.
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